Domination Withdrawal

One of the most common fantasies that I’ve noticed is domination.  This is huge subject!  It’s not simply leather and whips, domination is so intricate and detailed that there should be sub-topics on it.  This has become a unique challenge for me, because while I can easily slip into a Dominatrix role in real life, it’s much harder to recreate that atmosphere over the phone.  Not to mention the fact that because there are so many ways to dominate your partner it’s hard to know exactly what the client is requesting.  Humiliation is a form of domination that’s very easy to do over the phone.  The client will often volunteer the names and insults they want to hear during role play, and as we all know, humiliation is almost entirely verbal.  The most difficult domination request I received was from a client that wanted to be strapped to the floor naked with several women dangling stilettos from their toes.   Up to this point it sounded pretty good even to me.  A little fetish, and little bondage… just the right mood for a good domination fantasy.  Then it got a really hard to understand what he wanted these women to do for him.  Were they supposed to tease him by dangling their shoes in his face denying him the pleasure of licking them?  Did he want to feel the spiked heels against his skin?  Was I supposed to give a detailed description of what they looked like, was he into stockings?  I tried a couple of those with no response and it wasn’t long before he hung up.  I have no idea if he was just so excited by the idea that he finished quickly or if I was completely off the mark.  This is where I have trouble with domination.  It’s such a delicate balance between partners that it’s nearly impossible to create the right atmosphere in just a few seconds.  In a real life Dominatrix/Slave scenario it can take weeks for the Domme to find out what her client is into.  And the relationship, while founded purely on physical stimulation, is very personal.  Not something easily done in five minutes or less.  I have no doubt that there are women who can perform the domination role with no problems over the phone.  I am just not one of them, at least not when it comes to hard core domination.  Maybe I’m just too nice.  Although I seem to do wonderfully well with homosexual, transvestite and cross dressing clients.  But that’s another blog all of it’s own.  I will admit that any suggestions on this topic are more than welcome.  I just can’t leave it alone, must be the perfectionist in me.

Published in: on October 20, 2006 at 9:48 pm  Comments (3)  

Cat’s Got Your Tongue

It’s been a while since I’ve written, and for those of you who actually follow this, I apologize for the delay.  As I continue my journey through the world of adult entertainment, I realize that I like what I do.  I will admit, though, that there are some calls I could really do without.  And my biggest pet peeve is when clients call and don’t know what they want.  I have gotten calls that seemed to last forever…

“Hi! This is …

” “Hey,”

“So, what’s your name?”

“…mumble…”

“Hmmm?  I didn’t catch that.”

“Joe,”

“Hi Joe, watcha doing tonight?”

“Not much.”

“Did you have anything in mind for tonight?”

“Um, no, not really.”

“Mmm, why don’t you tell me what you like?”

“Anything,”

“Anything?  Well, that’s a lot!”

I don’t know about you, but I’m getting annoyed just writing it out!  It just goes on and on, anyway, you get the idea.  I get several calls that start out like this.  I have lots of ideas, the problem is trying to read the client so I provide the stimulation they want to hear.  What if the client wants me to describe a gay encounter and I suggest a blow job from a woman?  I’ve done that, believe me, it’s not good.  So if you decide to call in, have something in mind.  There’s nothing worse that trying to recommend something that’s only gonna make the client angry and then they either hang up on you or start getting nasty.  A little bit of advice; don’t get nasty, you’re only getting charged for being an ass.  Then I get requests to just moan and scream.  The client says nothing, doesn’t give any clue what so ever that they are enjoying themselves, they just want to hear moaning.  The problem with that is it’s very hard to moan and scream for that long and remain conscious.  I’m not trying to be sarcastic, I’m being very serious.  Try it and see how long you can go before you start seeing black spots swimming in front of your eyes.  Not very easy, is it?  If you’re into sound effects, fine, but try to break it up with some words of encouragement – ‘Oh, yeah baby!’ – so the girl providing your sound effects can take a breathe and doesn’t pass out on you.  Then there are the calls I get that leave me speechless.  The other night I had a client describe his first sexual encounter, at the age of eleven!  As I said in an earlier post, there are some topics that are taboo.  Rape is one of them.  And I have two children of my own!  That’s the main reason I opted for a company with rules.  Some things are illegal FOR A REASON!  Of coarse, there are those calls that are just so different from anything I can imagine that I don’t know how to react.  The one thing I’ve learned is that no matter what I come up with sexually, I know it will never be as kinky as what a man can think of.  Men have the wildest imaginations when it comes to sex!

Published in: on October 13, 2006 at 7:43 pm  Leave a Comment  

Meeting Desires and Expectations

I am still very inexperienced with my new job, but it’s starting to grow on me.  I have to admit that I was very worried that I would have moral issues or I just wouldn’t be any good at it.  I’m learning that moral issues don’t even exist for me.  I have had several clients call and tell me flat out that they have a wife/girlfriend away on business or otherwise not available and they miss her.  Think about it girls!  How many times have you used your toys to help alleviate how much you “miss” your guy?  There are toys out there for men, but even I have to admit that they may not do the trick and they don’t look quite as discreet or inviting as a vibe.  So I am only an aid for men who otherwise would much rather have the real woman of their dreams with them.  On the other hand, I have also had clients that can’t share their fantasies and desires with most partners because it may be too kinky, taboo, or any other label you want to attach to it.  Whatever the reason may be prompting them to call I have found that I am perfectly comfortable with and happy to oblige.  In the beginning I had worries that I would be terrible at this.  I’m starting to learn what to listen for and what questions to ask.  I can’t say for sure that I’m great at it, but I’m guessing I’m pretty good since most of my callers have been very satisfied with my services.  Part of this service is creating an illusion in their minds.  The most common fantasy so far is men wanting to dominate a younger woman.  In today’s society where women are strong, independent equals to their male counterparts it’s no wonder that men are looking for a place to be dominant.  From purely a genetic and historical point of view, males have always been the dominate species.  Men are taller, more muscular and heavier than women.  What woman hasn’t sighed at the sight of a well toned man with broad shoulders?  Go ahead, I dare you to recall the volley ball scene in Top Gun and not smile!  This is a sign of dominance and strength!  And women are natural caretakers.  We are not the “weaker” sex, if men had to endure what we do they would be on their knees!  My own husband has confirmed this lol.  It’s only natural that men desire a fantasy that is a part of who they are.  So to help out I’ve had to create girls’ that accommodate their wishes.  I don’t always know which girl to use with any given caller, so I use a different girl on different nights creating a pattern so that if one girl works then the client can choose to call on that night to talk to her.  I have to admit, it’s really fun!  One of my girls is naive and just lets a man take control working to please him.  I’ve also got a girl who’s more experienced and down right naughty.  This one likes spankings…  My third one caters to fetishes, I use her to describe sounds and sensations to the clients of the particular object they desire.  Of coarse I have to be ready to accommodate anything, but I use that as my guideline.  And as I learn more about what my clients want I will continue to fine tune my girls’ to be thier fantasy.

Published in: on October 3, 2006 at 5:27 pm  Leave a Comment