Cat’s Got Your Tongue

It’s been a while since I’ve written, and for those of you who actually follow this, I apologize for the delay.  As I continue my journey through the world of adult entertainment, I realize that I like what I do.  I will admit, though, that there are some calls I could really do without.  And my biggest pet peeve is when clients call and don’t know what they want.  I have gotten calls that seemed to last forever…

“Hi! This is …

” “Hey,”

“So, what’s your name?”


“Hmmm?  I didn’t catch that.”


“Hi Joe, watcha doing tonight?”

“Not much.”

“Did you have anything in mind for tonight?”

“Um, no, not really.”

“Mmm, why don’t you tell me what you like?”


“Anything?  Well, that’s a lot!”

I don’t know about you, but I’m getting annoyed just writing it out!  It just goes on and on, anyway, you get the idea.  I get several calls that start out like this.  I have lots of ideas, the problem is trying to read the client so I provide the stimulation they want to hear.  What if the client wants me to describe a gay encounter and I suggest a blow job from a woman?  I’ve done that, believe me, it’s not good.  So if you decide to call in, have something in mind.  There’s nothing worse that trying to recommend something that’s only gonna make the client angry and then they either hang up on you or start getting nasty.  A little bit of advice; don’t get nasty, you’re only getting charged for being an ass.  Then I get requests to just moan and scream.  The client says nothing, doesn’t give any clue what so ever that they are enjoying themselves, they just want to hear moaning.  The problem with that is it’s very hard to moan and scream for that long and remain conscious.  I’m not trying to be sarcastic, I’m being very serious.  Try it and see how long you can go before you start seeing black spots swimming in front of your eyes.  Not very easy, is it?  If you’re into sound effects, fine, but try to break it up with some words of encouragement – ‘Oh, yeah baby!’ – so the girl providing your sound effects can take a breathe and doesn’t pass out on you.  Then there are the calls I get that leave me speechless.  The other night I had a client describe his first sexual encounter, at the age of eleven!  As I said in an earlier post, there are some topics that are taboo.  Rape is one of them.  And I have two children of my own!  That’s the main reason I opted for a company with rules.  Some things are illegal FOR A REASON!  Of coarse, there are those calls that are just so different from anything I can imagine that I don’t know how to react.  The one thing I’ve learned is that no matter what I come up with sexually, I know it will never be as kinky as what a man can think of.  Men have the wildest imaginations when it comes to sex!

Published in: on October 13, 2006 at 7:43 pm  Leave a Comment  

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