It’s been a while since I’ve posted, but I’m back now. For a while anyway. I renewed my contract and following my own advice, I started back slowly. My first night on the phone can be summed up in one word: Bad! It was a lot harder than I thought! Most of my callers I couldn’t keep longer than two minutes and those I did keep didn’t last much longer. I’d like to think I haven’t lost my touch, but apparently I’m a little rusty. After being gone for so long I’ve lost my edge. It’s not new so there’s no excitement of the unknown. I’ve said all along that this job wasn’t easy, but this is by far the hardest challenge I’ve had to face. It was exciting at first, then it became more of a curiosity and finally I hit a stride and I knew I did my job well and pleased my clients. For the last couple of months I’ve spent my time being a “normal” stay-at-home-mom and I really like it. Staying up all hours of the night trying to get those calls and then dragging my ass out of bed the next morning has put a dark shadow over my job and under my eyes. I have always said this wasn’t a career for me, but it is a way to make money. Now instead of perusing porn for new ideas I find myself dreading getting on the phone every night. I’m hoping that as time passes I not only get better, but that I can also get past this phase. Many PSOs have worked the lines much longer than I have, and most have been able to draw a clear line between who they are in the real world and who they are on the phone. Right now my line’s a little smudged. I’ll get back on track sooner or later, but even if I don’t, it’s been one hell of a ride.